Things Could Be Worse

September 17, 2009.

I turned fifty a week ago yesterday. Their was no party, no birthday cards and of course no gifts. I did however enjoy coffee with a police liaison officer from the Blue Springs Police Dept. I enjoyed it immensely, it is good to have conversation with someone besides myself. She is a good person with a good will.

As I sit here this evening and reflect upon my life I am able to say without pause that my life has not turned out as I had expected. My savings account is an embarrassment. I have no family that speaks to me and no friends. My car is 15 years old with 225,000 + miles and tires that need air three times per week. Things could be worse.

I spend my days reading books, reading news on the internet, listening to talk radio, occasionally sending emails to the talk show host, okay more than occasionally, but it allows me an outlet to express my views. Sometimes I receive a response by email and sometimes my comments are read over the air, usually there is no response. It is good to express my views with someone besides myself. Things could be worse.

I feel autumn approaching, it is my second favorite season of year, following spring. I enjoy Indian summer here in the Midwest, sunny warm days and cool evenings under the blanket with the windows open. I look forward to the oncoming Holidays, even Halloween. I imagine behind those costumed children that perhaps my grandchildren will someday appear and surprise me, or perhaps when I answer the door to give the little goblins and angels their treats one of my two grown daughters will greet me with a Happy Halloween dad. One can always dream, can’t they? Things could be worse.

Perhaps the thing I enjoy most about this time of year is football season. This year will not be the same as previous seasons though. I have promised myself not to watch the games on CBS, ABC nor NBC. I simply cannot condone how these networks treat Americans. If I watch these channels I would simply be a part of the problem that is so pervasive in this great country. The problem of cultural corruption. I will address this problem in more detail with a later entry on my blog. I will simply listen to college games on the radio or the internet, with NFL games I can listen on the radio and watch on FOX. Things could be worse.

I often find myself at a local coffee shop called the Steamin’ Bean. I enjoy it there both when I am sitting outside on the patio and inside on rainy or cold days, the owners are very good people which to me means a great deal. While sitting there enjoying my latte I often overhear stories of hardships, mishaps and misfortunes. Inevitably they always end with one of the parties telling the other, at least you have your health, with the other responding, yes, thank God for that. That always makes me smile, for these people know, things could be worse.

In 1987 at the age of twenty-seven I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. My daughters were quite young back then so they do not recall the man I use to be. Today not one person I am an acquaintance with knew me for the athlete or the adventurer I was. They see me as guy who walks strangely and sounds as if he has had a bit to drink. My how my life has changed. The young man who once use to run 6 miles per day, throw a football 40 + yards, play pickup basketball with anyone, hit not just a fastball, but a curve or a slider out of the park has now relinquished these things for well over twenty years and has accepted that he can only enjoy those competitions vicariously. Things could be worse.